If anyone tells you that escorting is a piece of cake, they’re either lying or really hate you. My name’s Michelle and I’m here to list down the 5 most absurd questions I’ve heard in my 4 years of escorting –but continue to get.
“How about we get down to it first, and then get your money?”
First of all, rude. Second of all, that’s not even close to how escorting works. If you’re lucky, you’ll get an escort who’s okay with 50% payment upfront and the rest after the deed, but most of the time it’s payment before anything else. If you’re not okay with how it works, feel free to take your business elsewhere.
“Can we skip the condom? I don’t mind doing it raw with an escort.”
Well yeah, but maybe I mind doing it with you? I can say this on behalf on all the escorts that I know including myself –we take sexual health and personal grooming very seriously. I head to a gynecologist every once a month to ensure everything’s clean and a-okay, and I’m definitely not down to compromise that.
“Let’s go out on a date. A real one.”
I appreciate the sentiment on being asked out on a date. I really do! But sometimes I’d wish clients would understand that I’ve entered this job as just that; and that I’m not looking to personally date you or any other client I’ve had outside of what I do for you in the bedroom. So please understand that when I turn you down, it’s really nothing personal!
“Can I get a discount? I promise I’ll make up for it with my performance.”
Whether or not you’re a sexual God sent down specifically for my lonesome is completely immaterial. Your sexual performance, physical attributes or large package isn’t going to get you a discount. Period.
“Tell me about your real job. Is Michelle even your real name?”
Don’t mistake my cheerful demeanor as an invitation to pry into my life. Escorts use an alias for a reason –it’s literally a matter of our own safety. I’ll be happy to answer any questions you might have about the session and engage in dirty talk all night long, but details such as my real number, job, full name, where I live and other information about my family and friends are strictly off limits.
xoxo,
Michelle.