What It’s Like to Fall in Love with Your Colleague

Chances are that if you’re in the office for 5 days a week, from 9-5 –you’re going to be spending a whole lot of time with your colleagues. That’s what I was doing anyway. Mark and I started out as kindred souls, somehow always finishing each other’s sentences, complaining about new HR policies, buying each other lunch.
 
You get the drill. Then one day we both got to the office early –and that’s when it really set in. He was seated at the window with a cup of coffee in his hands. The sun hit his face just right, and it all clicked.

Mark was totally hot.

How could I not notice this before? We’ve been working under the same department for almost a year –so why was this happening now?!

Things definitely took a turn after that morning. I blushed deeper when he set a plate of Chinese food on my table, looked away when he stared at me dead in the eyes. I knew that I had to get rid of this crush (and fast!) if I ever hoped to get a lick of work done without ogling my colleague.

But somehow, someway that ogling became something more. INSIDER once published an article that talked about how some people experience ‘vicinity attraction’ which is a minor crush that follows a person if they spend a whole lot of time around another. But weeks turned to months, and the more time I spent together with Mark the more I was convinced he felt the same way.

It was in the little thing at first. Sometimes I would catch him staring at me longer than he needed to. Once we shared an Uber together, and he paid for our total fare. I didn’t know what it meant -I still don’t- but each day goes by and Mark continues to be everything I think about.

I really love my job, and have no plans of leaving it any time soon. It’s harmless to have a little office crush, but if you’re reading this and going through the same thing –I hope you either nip it in the bud or confess. Not knowing is going to kill you; like it’s slowly ending me.