Ryde Escorts

Hi there boyssss, and you naughty little lasses

I am Melody, the kinkiest English Lass you will come across.

I like things wild and fun and my service will have you completely satisfied when I am finished with you 😈😈

$100 deposit required for ALL new clients, this is to ensure my safety and my time is not wasted - this is a non negotiable

NATURAL ORAL

KISSING

MASSAGE

MULTIPLE POSITIONS

MUTUAL ORAL

SHOWER FOR TWO

COB

COF

MULTIPLE SHOTS

BELOW SERVICES ARE ADDED TO THE GFE FOR PSE - EXTRA $200 TO TURN A GFE INTO A PSE

CIM

RIMMING ON ME

COSTUMES/ FANTASY

TOY PLAY

GAGGING

SWALLOW - at my discretion

ANAL PLAY ON YOU

EXTRAS $$$

STRAP ON ON YOU

MMF

ANAL - EXTRA $400PH

My absolute favourite thing is to watch you squirm with pleasure as my sultry mouth works it's magic, with the best natural oral you will ever encounter 😈

My prices

15 min “quickie” TOURS ONLY $350

30 mins (incall only) - $500

1 hour - $700

Outcall to your place or a hotel (minimum 1 hour for outcalls)

• my ubers there and back to be covered by you

1 hour outcall - $$700

2 hours outcall - $1400

If there is any service you have been wanting to try, please let me know and I will be happy to discuss with you xx

I look forward to showing you my English charm

Melody 😈

Hey, I'm Faye - the perfect blend of friendly, enticing & flirtatious!

I'm quite a down to earth individual with a naturally comforting presence who relishes in not just the physical parts, but every aspect in-between. I love to chat & converse with people - I feel that it's equally as important to connect, get to know one another a bit to create a kind of chemistry that can't be bought, it can only ever be made organically.

DISCLAIMER - *please read the entire ad before you text me!

*Currently ONLY advertising HERE (Escorts and Babes)

*Deposit required for ALL bookings, no exceptions

*Deposit & photo ID required for outcalls

*Text or email only- more responsive over text - phone calls will be ignored

*Newcastle is my base location, I tour as well so make sure you're looking for the right place & date

*If a tour has dates, it's confirmed. If not, it's to assess interest- if you want to confirm a touring location, PREBOOK me

*I only offer in person experiences - no content/virtual sessions

*I do NOT OFFER BBBJ/UNPROTECTED SERVICES

AVAILABILITY

Newcastle -

Available Sunday 1st - Tuesday 3rd November - cbd location

Outcalls can be arranged most days

*Highly advise prebooking to ensure that you won't miss me* 💟

I'm a petite Australian/European mix with curly brunette hair (can be blonde if you'd like it to be), big blue eyes, soft curves that are all natural. I have a girl next door look, but my personality is naughty and nice, sugar and spice. I give back the energy that I receive - approach me with minimal effort, manners or respect in your enquiry & I'll send it right back

Please message me the following to make a booking: 💙

• Your name
• Location
• Preferred date/time
• Duration - how long you'd like to stay
• My place (incall) or yours (outcall)
• What type of booking - standard service or if after any extras 💙

Rates listed on my ad are for standard service, which includes:

massage/cuddling, kissing (closed mouth), hand job, protected blow job, protected sex (multiple positions)

EXTRAS - what's included for each can be slightly curated to your own taste, you just need to ask me!

GFE: - $150 - kissing/dfk, oral on me, fingering, toys

PSE: - $250 deepthroat, sloppy bj, rough sex, light spanking/choking, toys, dirty talk, dom/sub

GREEK: - $300 - anal play/anal - please note that I need to prep for this so must be arranged in advance

PEGGING: - $150 - anal play/anal - range of toys and dildo sizes!

COUPLES/THREESOME: - FEMALES GET DISCOUNTED RATES - PRICES VARY - please text me with all the details of booking listed and we'll go from there

BDSM/ROLE PLAY: - PRICES VARY - please tell me what you'd like to include and we can go from there

ELITE AUSTRALIAN AND EUROPEAN LADIES

Newcastle's #1 Adult Venue & Escort Agency - See why we are!

With a reputation second to none in the Newcastle & Hunter Region.

The best range of ladies and services available.

There is nothing more exciting than a wide selection of stunning ladies, Ready to meet your every desire.

All our ladies are hand picked, meeting our high level of standards.

OUR GIRLS CAN VISIT YOU DISCREETLY AT YOUR HOME OR HOTEL

Just imagine the anticipation and excitement as you wait for your DISCREET lady to arrive.

We offer a mix of:

*STUNNING REGULAR LADIES*

*LADIES WHO HAVE NEVER WORKED BEFORE*

*A REVOLVING SELECTION OF INTERSTATE LADIES*

Contact us to book your appointment, Lets us help you turn all your wildest dreams, into a reality.

In call & out call available

0481 823 223

Come in and meet the beautiful babes on offer at

687 Hunter St, Newcastle West.

We also offer

DOM SERVICE

SUBMISSIVE SERVICE

ON-SITE STRIPPERS

FACILITIES FOR BUCKS PARTIES

To view our ladies and our ladies visit us at

Newcastle Escorts | Exotic Escorts in Newcastle | Check out Our Ladies (discreet.net.au)

This gorgeous girl is one of our most stunning Newcastle escorts

Lexi is a slim size 8 with impressive double D's

She has a youthful gentleness, soft skin and a stunning smile

Down to earth, caring and compassionate and unconditionally kind hearted

Lexi is the perfect mix of beauty and brains. She is university educated and well travelled adding depth to her natural conversationalist personality

In addition to her sizzling standard full service she also offers and incredible nationally recognized ( AAIA nominated) Girl friend experience

Specializing in an unrushed experience that is attentive and will leave you feeling like a king.

SMS - 0481 823 223

The name on everyone's lips - Discreet.

With a reputation second to none in the Hunter region.

Come and see why we're known for having the HOTTEST ladies and the WILDEST parties.

It only begs the question - ours or yours..?

[ Discreet Escorts ]

Incall facility: 687 Hunter St, Newcastle West

Just arrived in Hamilton,AVAILABLE NOW

I am your all-natural My striking brown eyes, long legs, tight figure, long brown hair, BIG breasts big ass , will have you captivated instantly and needing to satisfy your temptation.

If you would like to make a booking send me a text message including;

 -length of booking requested

-preferred time/day

-How long

-your location for outcalls

❌❌❌"Please note that I may not be able to respond to additional photo requests. Thank you for your understanding.

photos on advertising verified by the site 100% real

I can provide you with a Girlfriend Experience (GFE) or a more personal and passionate Pornstar Experience (PSE)

-if there’s a particular service you’re wanting so I can let you know whether I offer it or not etc 💋

I'm playful and friendly, I can hold an intelligent conversation with an alluring sultry charm- definitely anything but boring! I’m down to earth, and I hold myself with class and elegance- but don’t get me wrong, in private your temptations will be more than satisfied and your fantasies will become reality, and your time with me is guaranteed to be unforgettable….. let’s indulge xo

💋 Katharine

✅ Text Only

✅filming extra (ask for more)

✅ Dinner Dates, Multiple Hours

✅Anal add100

❌No Natural Sex

❌No Selfies 

❌No finger inside me

❌ No Refund money if you finish early

 Text me about my rates for appointments

DON’T ASK FOR MORE PHOTOS OR VIDEOS CALL

📌NO RESPONSE

My name is Saya,

Curious about me?

you should be.

I'm a down to earth, adventurous Asian gal with bright brown eyes offering a sexy and sensual experience that will have you begging for more!

I'm 165cm tall, I'm eager to please you and make sure you'll have a great time and cum back for more.

I'm a playful 28 yrs old. Am all natural beauty. Allow me to pamper you and tease you

I'm the girlfriend of your dreams ready to fulfil your fantasies! i offer an independent and discrete fun full service at its finest....waiting to make your day unforgettable.

I'm very laid-back and so easy to get long with, I have a natural ability to always make you feel at complete ease and safe in a non judgmental environment when your spending your time with me.

Let me cater to you like it's your birthday and give you the best service that will meet your expectations.

Unforgettable Girlfriend Experience::

15 min 120$

30 min 150$

45 min 200$

60 min 250$

Sensual Massage (with a cheeky happy ending):

30 min 130$

45 min 160$

60 min 200$

Janet st Jesmond Newcastle 

Please call or text 0420417370 with your preferred service, time and duration :)

I do not provide Natural sex, and I do

not provide Anal please do not ask :)

Extras available (we can discuss in person)

Thank you

Providing notice allows me to prepare properly, ensuring our time together is relaxed, unrushed, and enjoyable for us both.

exotic massages

15 minutes $150

30 minutes $300

45 minutes $450

60 minutes $600

when on tour I do provide an overnight service for $5000, which ensures 2 hours intimate time and 6 hours uninterrupted sleep

For all new clients, a small security deposit for bookings over 30 minutes duration as well as a photo selfie is required as standard practice. This helps confirm bookings and is essential for my personal safety. If you’re not comfortable proceeding with this, I kindly ask that you refrain from reaching out, as this requirement is non-negotiable for my safety and can’t be negotiated unless you are already a client of mine.

All bookings 30 minutes and over will require a $50-100 deposit

In your intro message, please add as many details as possible, include your name, describe the booking you are after (how long, what time, what day) and confirm what location it would be for as I have multiple tours running at a time.

Rules

Please remember to always be kind, and refrain from calling, this is a work phone number and not always on hand, a text reply will be sent.

No party bookings

No outcalls or car meets

No natural or cob, cof or cim and bbbj is only offered to existing clients at my discretion, new clients will be covered bj

Pse is an extra $200 on top of the standard booking

Outfit requests are an extra $50 depending on availability

A bit about me

At the end of the day I am a very real person, you're not just booking the body, you're booking a whole experience!

I am very aware that many people get nervous when booking, so I do my best to accommodate, if that be that I answer the door in casual clothes, start a conversation before rushing into anything or offering a drink. I make sure those nerves disappear.

 I love how I offer my girlfriend bookings, connection is definitely lacking in the world lately, so in a booking with me, connection is my main goal with great sex as a bonus

TS Filipina Dominant Top Fantasy – Sweet, Seductive and Submissive Bottom

Sweet Like a Girlfriend… Naughty When You Want More 💋

Hey love… I’m Rose, a Filipina trans enchantress with a soft voice, slow movements, and a dangerously tempting presence. I adore teasing glances, lingering touches, and moments where the tension between us becomes impossible to ignore. Spend a little time with me… and you might find yourself wanting much more than you planned.

sweet like your girlfriend… but with a playful naughty side waiting to be discovered.I’m the kind of girl who can be 

I offer a sensual GFE experience where chemistry, teasing energy, and genuine connection come first. I love playful flirtation, soft touches, and moments that slowly build into something exciting and unforgettable.

I’m open-minded, affectionate, and fetish-friendly, welcoming gentlemen who appreciate beauty, warmth, and a woman who enjoys every moment she spends with you.

Spend time with me and you’ll discover why some connections feel a little more addictive than others

Your privacy matters. Your comfort comes first.

FaceTime verification available on request.

📞 0410003791

Step into my world, babe…

Let me be your sweetest danger.

Your Rose is waiting. 🌹💋

instagram @its_chicrose

X @itschicRose

TikTok @itschicrose

Welcome to my world… ✨

I’m KIARA — a Brazilian TS with a warm personality, irresistible energy and a playful side that’s just waiting to be discovered.

Every meeting is different because you are different. Tell me what you enjoy, what you’re curious about and what you’ve been wanting to experience — and we can create something that feels personal to you.

TOP & BOTTOM • 21cm × 6cm — very thick

Whether you already know exactly what you enjoy or you’re simply curious to explore something new, I believe every encounter should feel exciting, relaxed, personal and unforgettable.

If this is your first experience with a TS, there’s absolutely no need to feel nervous. I’m discreet, attentive and easy to be around. Your privacy is extremely important to me, and I’ll make sure you feel comfortable and completely at ease from the moment we meet.

I’ll keep your secret… and perhaps I’ll even teach you how to fly. ✨

I naturally enjoy being TOP a little more, but I also love being BOTTOM. For me, chemistry matters. I enjoy discovering what makes you tick, creating the right atmosphere and simply enjoying the moment together.

✦ What I offer;

✦ Passionate GFE

✦ Spicy PSE

✦ TOP & BOTTOM

✦ Intimate games

✦ Fetishes & fantasies

✦ And much more…

🔥 Private Live Cam Sessions 🔥

Want some one-on-one attention? I’m available for private live sessions via FaceTime or WhatsApp.

✨ 5 min — $200

🔥 10 min — $250

💋 15 min — $300

Private. Personal. Just you and me. 😉

Discretion • Hygiene • Respect • Chemistry

Your message is always welcome. If I don’t answer immediately, I may simply be enjoying a moment that deserves my full attention. Leave me a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I’m available.

For bookings, please contact me directly.

Advance booking is highly recommended — preferably at least one hour before your desired appointment.

Come curious…

leave with a memory you won’t forget. 💋

KIARA LIMA

With long legs made to tease, blue eyes that undress you in a heartbeat, and tattoos tracing all the places your hands will want to explore… I’m the woman who turns curiosity into desire the moment I walk in.

I’m luxurious in the way I move, seductive in the way I speak — and just a little wicked in the way I play,I’ll make you forget every other woman you’ve ever booked 

If you’re searching for a naughty escape with a playful, sensual edge… I’m the one you need…

📍OUTCALLS ONLY📍

📍Travel fees vary depending on location📍

📍DEPOSIT REQUIRED FOR ALL NEW CLIENTS

▪️ Deposits payable to my BEEM account,

No Payid, No PayPal

If you don’t have BEEM, download it and set up account it takes 5mins and is secure and easy to use▪️

▪️If your not ok to pay deposit, then please don’t msg me▪️ Deposits are to secure your booking with me, and show me your not going to waste my time▪️

💋QUICKIE- BLOW N GO💋

🧭 15MINS - BBBJ $250 • BBBJ + Sex $350

🧭 30MINS - BBBJ $350 • BBBJ + Sex $450

🌷GFE🌷

• sexy lingerie - massage - kissing - cuddles - covered bj - covered sex

💎 30MINS $450

💎45MINS $550

💎1HR $700

COUPLES💎 $750hr

🎉 PSE 🎉

GFE + BBBJ - deep throat - Dirty talk - gagging - ball licking • rimming on you - rimming on me - hair pulling - hard fucking - COF or COT

💎 30MINS $700

💎 45MINS $850

💎 1HR. $1000

COUPLES 💎 $1200hr

😈 EXTRAS 😈

• CIMWS + $100

• PEGGING + $400

• GOLDEN SHOWER 4 U + $200

• FINDOM TAKE ME SHOPPING + $400hr

• BACK DOOR + $200

⭐️ LINGERIE- TOPLESS - NUDE WAITRESSING for private functions, bucks parties, or if your a guy that just wants a sexy lady to chill with and or bring you drinks and snacks.

💎 $400hr

⭐️ LINGERIE- NUDE HOUSEKEEPING services such as Folding/ ironing clothes, wiping down countertops, light dusting, sweeping. All while you just sit back and enjoy.

💎30MINS $300

💎 1HR $500

▪️Not A Cleaning service ▪️light housekeeping jobs only

👙 BUY My PANTIES👙

💎Regular worn $50 each

Want me to wear them for 2 or 3 days ?

Work out in them ?

Maybe cum in them for you ?

Custom request taken, tell me what you want !

💎 Custom Panties $100 each

Discreet Shipping $10

 ❌I DONT ANSWER CALLS

🚫 NO PRIVATE NUMBERS

🚫 DO NOT CALL

🚫 TEXT ONLY

🚫 ALL RATES ARE NON NEGOTIABLE

🚫 DONT TEXT ‘HI’ or ‘R U FREE’

🚫 DONT WASTE MY TIME

💳 Pay to my beem acc @MinxLaLa💳

💋 BIG NEWS!!! ----->

🍒 EVEN BIGGER TITS NOW (NO PHOTOS ON HERE OF THEM YET SO COME SEE THEM IN PERSON 🤭)

Hiyah! Call me Scarlett.

The description says it!! But yes! FAKE TITS! BOLT ONs

Ever wanted to play with a fake body? Cum on some big fake tits? Be sucked off with juicy filler lips?

I am an enhanced milf, providing social company, GFE or PSE and everything in between!

My BBBJs are said to be out of this world, DT is one of my specialities.. come find out if you don't believe me 😜

For those asking, my FS includes almost everything xxx I love to accommodate!

Happy to accommodate to fetishes and niches please reach out and chat first x

Incall rates (Home Base Location - Coffs)

PLEASE READ UNDER RATES for TOUR PRICING.

15 minutes - $200 - Blow and Go (no sex)

30 minutes - $350

1 hour - $600

1.5 hour $800

2 hours - $1000

Message me to book xx

WAYS TO PAY:

Please come organised

I DO NOT DO PAY ID

Options:

CASH 💸

Beemit

*** CHECK ME OUT ***

https://onlyfans.com/thescarlettnash

Indian beauty with soft skin, Natural curves, a cheeky smile & a warm welcoming energy that will instantly put you at ease.

Soft Caramel Skin, Ample bust and curves that could kill – this woman is a goddess in the flesh. Round bubble butt and Double D’s mean your hands are always full!

What Jasmine offers

• Passionate Girl friend experience
• PSE
• Sensual massage
• Kink, Fantasy and role play
• Pegging
• Lesbian doubles, couples, groups and party bookings
• Dirty talk in Hindi and Punjabi 
• Kamasutra lingam massage

Jasmine offers a relaxed open-minded experience that’s all about fun, chemistry and genuine connection. Whether you’re after laughter, deep conversation or passionate companionship, Jasmine will make sure you feel special and completely at ease.

Ready to please Make a Booking with our Indian Princess today !!

SMS - 0481 823 223

The name on everyone's lips - Discreet.

With a reputation second to none in the Hunter region.

Come and see why we're known for having the HOTTEST ladies and the WILDEST parties.

It only begs the question - ours or yours...?

[ Discreet Escorts ]

Incall facility: 687 Hunter St, Newcastle West

Hi gentlemen!

If you are looking for a sweet-casual encounter with a twist of girlfriend experience, then I guess the search is over, you are on the right page.

My name is Hailey, your 22 yo escort. I am a girl who was raised with class, passion, and etiquette. I’m up for almost anything- dates, companions, deep and intellectual conversations which I find interesting because I love feeding my mind through sharing and listening to stories from people. I am your sweetheart who can help you fulfill your unbridled sexual fantasies while keeping them private. I’ll let you undress me and let my alluring body find out the hidden lust in you and turn it into liquid or burst into flames. My enchanting eyes and luscious lips will leave a little sparkle wherever you go.

I can be the escape from the mundane you crave, the release you desire or the adoration you deserve, either way I’ll make sure our experience together will be replaying on your mind long after we’ve parted, leaving you forever wanting more...

I love to make a genuine connection with those who I meet and will always prefer and find it easiest to build this chemistry with quality gentlemen. I appreciate being contacted by a man who knows how to indulge in himself and am grateful that you’ve taken time out of your busy day to do so.

Every encounter with me is an invitation to embrace pleasure and authenticity.

My passion as a companion has always been a main pillar in my life but at the moment I am not available all the time and rarely last minute as I have another thriving business.

Contact me last minute to check but consider contacting me in advance if you can.

XX Hailey XX

Hey there, sexy! 😘 I'm your Kinky Dream, a 20yo petite Caucasion Aussie ready to set your world on fire!

I ONLY TAKE 1 OR TWO BOOKINGS A DAY

BOOK CORRECTLY NOW:

NAME: Joe

ETHNICITY: italian

TIME:1 pm

HOW LONG:1hr $600

I WILL TXT AFTER DEPOSIT AND CALL TO DISCUSS IDEAL FANTASY BOOKING***

FOR MY PEACE OF MIND / SAFETY:

REQUIRED DEPOSIT PAYID

🔥 Playful, flirty, and deliciously naughty—I'm the perfect blend of sweet and sinful.

😈 With my chill, submissive vibe, I’m here to bring your wildest fantasies to life in Newcastle, NSW.

💋Here’s what you’re in for:

🌟 An unrushed, high-class experience that’ll leave you craving more

💬 A steamy pre-call chat to tease out your desires

🚿 A relaxing off-clock shower to wash away your haed day of work or play...ill then show you into my king bedroom.

💆‍♂️ A sensual massage between rounds on a luxe king-size bed

👗 Me in a sexy outfit, with 4K XXX vibes setting the scene 😘

😈 Open-minded fun: from natural creampies to MMF tag teams, bi-threesomes, or kinky couple play

👴 Older gentlemen and first-timers? I’ll blow your mind with my cheeky, genuine charm!

A small deposit secures your spot, followed by a 5-min discreet call to plan our naughty adventure.

✨ Let’s make sparks fly—text me now and dive into pure pleasure! 💦😉

Flirty, Busty & Sweet as Sin 💋

Hey handsome, 

I’m Allison, 21 and full of playful energy the perfect mix of innocence and temptation. I’ve got that naughty student charm, a flirty grin and just enough sweetness to keep you guessing. Don’t be fooled by my shy smile though once I get comfortable, the wild side comes out to play.

I’m all about soft curves, a tiny waist and a busty figure that loves to be admired. My skin’s smooth as silk, my eyes do the teasing and my lips love to get you thinking wicked thoughts. Whether I’m in something lacy or just a cheeky smile, I know exactly how to keep your attention.

You’ll get the real GFE treatment with me warm cuddles, sweet kisses, playful chats and that spark that makes it all feel natural. It’s about connection, laughter and letting the chemistry flow until things turn deliciously naughty.

I can be a little shy at first, but once the mood’s right, I’ll surprise you with just how bold I can be. Flirty, sensual and dangerously addictive, I’m here to be your secret escape and the fantasy you can’t shake. Ready when you are, babe. 😘

Hi! I'm Orange! Super sweet with a little bit of zing!

The moment your set your eyes upon my tiny little body you will be speechless (don't let my size fool you, I have the heart of a tiger!).

I am extremely energetic, bubbly and eager to please! 

I specialise in fantasy and costumes! I can be everything from your dirty little schoolgirl to that drop dead gorgeous maid you cant take your eyes off.

I provide an incredibly intense, passionate and unrushed experience that will leave you begging for more (I promise, I will be your new addiction ;))

I'm also professionally trained in Thai Massage and I can provide a sensual massage so deep that I touch your soul if you just want to relax, and be taken to another, euphoric world.

You will yearn for the feeling of my soft, tanned, angelic skin against yours.

When we are together, my attention is 100% on you, I'm not watching clocks and I am often quite generous with my time if we are having fun.

Pls call or txt me on 0420298064 with your preferred service, time and duration :)

I do not provide Natural sex, and I do not provide Anal, please do not ask :)

Extras available (we can discuss in person)

Thank you

hey I’m Izzolabella!

I’m the kind of woman you remember long after our time together ends… refined, attentive, and genuinely passionate about creating an unforgettable experience.

Im new to the industry, and I take pride in the connection I build with my clients. Making you feel completely desired, relaxed, and your needs are my focus in every moment. I’ve been told more than once that my attention to detail and natural enthusiasm set me apart, and that time with me leaves a lasting impression.

I can take it slow if that’s what you enjoy, or we can switch things up and allow me to show you my NAUGHTY side🫦💦

I truly enjoy what I do, and it shows. I pay attention to your body language to understand what makes you wild.. I am only satisfied once I know you are truly satisfied.. I get off on pleasing you!!

I ensure that our time together will be a memorable one, nothing is rushed or routine.

Discretion, and mutual respect are everything to me.🤫

I maintain exceptional hygiene and expect the same from my clients, because a premium experience should feel as good as it looks.

If you’re seeking someone who is not only beautiful, but genuinely invested in giving you an experience that feels personal, indulgent, and unforgettable… you’ve just found her.😘

Hallie – A sensual dreamPlease help us say hello to –

Tall beautiful brunette with a personality to keep you coming back for more every time.

Specializes in sensual girlfriend experiences, light PSE, couples experiences, stripping, fetish and kink on request

SMS - 0481 823 223

The name on everyone's lips - Discreet.

With a reputation second to none in the Hunter region.

Come and see why we're known for having the HOTTEST ladies and the WILDEST parties.

It only begs the question - ours or yours...?

[ Discreet Escorts ]

Incall facility: 687 Hunter St, Newcastle West

Hi im Jana,

Send me a text and come and say hi xx

I appreciate good manners and i will respond by catering to you with an unforgettable experience.

My face and body are my business and i take good care of them. I stay in only the best hotels and i keep them clean. The majority of my clients have become regulars because of my cleanliness, professionalism and the ability to hold a conversation.

I love heels and lingerie and will usually greet you at the door in my favourite Honey birdette- feel free to request colours or style :)

Non smoker, but ill usually have a wine for you on arrival.

All bookings require a small deposit.

SMS is preferred, private call wont be answered.

Yo. I’m Mei. 👋

45 years old. Yeah, that’s right – half a century of dirty wisdom packed into a body that still makes boys cry n’ men beg. 🍑💋

Don’t expect no fancy lady bullshit from me. I ain’t here to sip tea n’ talk feelings. I’m here to fuckin’ devour u – then kick ur sorry ass out so I can nap. 😴

———————————————————————

Lemme tell u somethin’ that happened 2 months ago – cuz this is the energy u get with me:

JAN heatwave from hell, my AC’s been dead for three days. Sweat’s drippin’ off my tits like a leaky faucet. This lanky repair dude shows up – armpits lookin’ like two wet raccoons. I answer the door in a soaked-ass tank top (no bra, obviously) n’ a thong that’s basically a fuckin’ dental floss challenge. 🥵

He’s tryna act professional, checkin’ the thermostat. But I’m leanin’ over him – my sweat’s literally ploppin’ onto his tool belt. He’s turnin’ red like a tomato. Finally he just SNAPS – shoves me onto the couch, rips my panties off with his teeth (yeah, the dude’s got skills). Then he gives me the messiest, wettest, loudest head of my entire damn life. I’m screamin’ so hard my neighbor texts “u ok?” – bitch I’m FANTASTIC. 🤪

After I came three times from his tongue alone, he wraps his shit up (cuz I ain’t stupid) n’ takes me missionary while the dead fan spins above us like a useless ceiling jewelry. I come two more times. He fixed the AC after. Barely. 😂

That’s the kinda wild shit u get when u call me. Not some starfish deadfish.

———————————————————————

I ain’t gonna pretend I’m a “graceful lady” – nah. I’m that 45yo MILF who knows exactly where ur dick wants to be before u do. 💅

I’ll ride u like a stolen Harley – bounce on that cock till u see stars n’ beg me to slow down (I won’t). Or bend u over my couch n’ make u watch yourself in the mirror while I take what I want. 🛋️💦

Wanna shove my face into the mattress n’ pound me from behind? Go ahead – but don’t cry when u can’t walk straight after.

Wanna lay back n’ let me do all the work? Fine by me – I’ll drain every drop n’ leave u twitchin’.

I love havin’ a wet face – so if u got a tongue, use it. I’ll grind on ur mouth ‘til my legs shake. 😛

———————————————————————

💰 Payment – don’t waste my time:

Cash 💵 or PAYID (instant only – if it says “pending” or “delayed” I’m ghostin’ ur ass. No joke.)

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📱 Hit me up by TEXT only.

I ain’t answerin’ calls while I’m busy gettin’ my back blown out by some other lucky bastard. I’ll text u back when I’m done – could be 5 mins, could be 5 hours. Deal with it. 😘

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I’m Indepent , Private. Discreet? Yeah, sure – but also loud as fuck if u do it right.

Come over or don’t. I really don’t give a shit. But if u do… bring water. U gonna need it. 💧

– Mei 🦊

The 45yo chaos u didn’t know u needed